"Arrr! The fine folks of USAID be sent to dry dock fer a spell, matey!"
2025-02-06
Arrr, matey! Ol' Captain Trump and his first mate Musk be stirrin' the seas o' USAID! On Tuesday, the cap'n put most scallywags on leave, keepin' only the trusty crew for vital tasks. They be sailin' to spread democracy 'n riches across the seven seas in 2023!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn o’ the high seas of politics! Our cap’n, President Trump, and the swashbucklin’ tech wizard Elon Musk be sailin’ into treacherous waters, seekin’ to overhaul the good ship known as USAID. After a fortnight and a half o’ schemin’ and dreamin’, the cap’n dropped the anchor on Tuesday, signin’ an order that cast most o’ the crew into the briny deep o’ administrative leave.Now, fear not, for a few brave souls—those tasked with tendin’ to the mission-critical functions and steering the ship—be spared from walkin’ the plank. Aye, they be the chosen ones, keepin’ the lights on while the rest be enjoyin’ a taste o’ the rum and relaxation.
USAID, ye see, be on a noble quest to spread democratic values across the seven seas, strivin’ for a world that be free, peaceful, and prosperous. In this year of our Lord, 2023, they be committed to keepin’ the sails full and the flag flyin’ high! So, raise a mug o’ grog for the crew and hope that this here tempest blows over, lest we all end up with barnacles on our bottoms!