The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Tim Walz's lass be spoutin’ fiery words 'gainst Trump’s decree on them swashbucklin’ transgender athletes! Avast!

2025-02-12

Arrr, matey! Young Hope Walz be spouting her thoughts on the TikTok seas, takin’ aim at Cap'n Trump and his decree banishin’ transgender scallywags from the fairer sportin' fields. A true treasure of a lass, stirrin' the pot with a hearty laugh, she be!

Arrr mateys! Gather ye round fer a tale from the land o’ Minnesota, where Governor Tim Walz's lass, Hope Walz, be makin’ waves on the high seas of TikTok! This young buccaneer took to the digital waters, settin’ her sights on President Trump’s order that seeks to ban transgender athletes from women’s sports, claimin’ it be a “dangerous precedent.”

She declared on the video that the real peril be not from trans folk but from the straight white scallywags who be makin’ the rules. “I’ve ne’er felt unsafe around a trans person!” she declared boldly, suggestin’ the matter be as fictitious as a ghost ship! In a follow-up, she waved her flag, claimin’ that Trump’s crew be riddled with “credible allegations” more plentiful than the trans athletes in high school!

But hold yer horses, for the seas be stormy! The United Nations be sayin’ that nearly 900 biological females lost medals to these trans marauders, sparkin’ a ruckus among the swabs! While Minnesota and California be raisin’ the black flag against Trump’s order, the debate rages on like a tempest at sea! So, hoist the anchor, me hearties, for this saga be far from over!

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