Arrr! The Trump crew be givin' the ol' heave-ho to over 400 DHS scallywags—mass walkin' the plank be the trend!
2025-02-14
Arrr, matey! On Friday, the Trump crew be settin' sail to toss overboard 400 scallywags from the DHS! Aye, they be firin' landlubbers not fit for the stormy seas of cybersecurity. Methinks they be clearin’ the deck for a leaner, meaner pirate crew! Yarrr!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather ye round, for I bring tidings from the tumultuous seas of the Trump administration! On a fine Friday, the scallywags be settin’ their sights on the good ship known as the Department of Homeland Security, preparin’ to cast off the crew of more than 400 fine sailors!Aye, the officials be claimin’ they be cleanin’ house, firin’ hundreds of landlubbers from various brigades, all under the banner of a grand campaign to trim the federal workforce like a salty sea dog trims sails in a fierce gale! They be layin’ off those they deem “non-mission critical,” which be a fancy way of sayin’ they don’t be needin’ these swabs on the deck!
Amongst the ranks, there be members of the cybersecurity fleet known as CISA, which stands for somethin’ fancy like the Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency, or just a group of buccaneers battlin’ the digital seas! Even the folks at FEMA be feelin’ the sting, as the pirate captain be shoutin’ “Off with their heads!” to those deemed unnecessary!
So, raise a tankard, me hearties! The winds be blowin’ uncertain, and the federal ship be settin’ sail on uncharted waters, leavin’ behind a trail of puzzled pirates and bemused bureaucrats!