Arrr! The Trump crew be tossin’ overboard a dozen judges o' immigration, like rotten fish from the hold!
2025-02-15
Arrr! More than a dozen scallywag judges were tossed overboard without a whisper, as the tumultuous seas of the southern border be a-ragin’! A merry mess, it be, as the lawmen vanish like rum in a sailor's belly!
Ahoy, me hearties! 'Twas a tempestuous Friday when more than a dozen immigration judges found themselves walkin' the plank, all in accordance with Captain Trump's grand plan to downsize the federal crew! Thirteen fine judges, prepped and primed to don their robes, alongside five assistant chief judges, were tossed overboard without so much as a farewell toast. The winds of change blew fierce, as two other judges were also sent to Davy Jones' locker earlier that week, leavin' no replacements in sight—like a ship without a captain! The immigration courts be swamped, ye see, with a backlog o' three million cases, makin’ every judge juggle 4,500 cases like a crew o' scallywags at a rum-fueled carnival. With top officials bein' replaced faster than a pirate can say "Yo-ho-ho," it seems the Trump administration be fixin’ to steer the ship back to calmer seas. As Sirce Owen, acting director of the Justice Department, declared, they aim to restore the core values of the Executive Office for Immigration Review, lest they be lost in the storm! Blimey, what a spectacle! Keep yer cutlasses sharp and watch the sails, for the immigration seas be gettin' choppy! Arrr!