The Booty Report

Arrr! South Carolina's makin' it illegal to puff yer pipe in yer ship with wee mateys aboard!

2025-02-18

Arrr, mateys! A band o' South Carolina senators be settin' sail on a new decree—no puffin' away in a ship’s cabin with a wee scallywag aged twelve or younger! Aye, lest ye be walkin' the plank for blowin' smoke around the young 'uns! Ha!

Arrr matey! Gather ‘round fer a curious tale from the fair shores of South Carolina, where a band of senators be plotin' to cast away the foul clouds of smoke from the cabins of ye motor vessels when wee ones be aboard! Aye, ‘tis a bipartisan crew led by the noble Sen. Darrell Jackson, a fine Democrat, aim’n to shield the young’uns from the evil grip of secondhand smoke, much like twelve other savvy states already done.

Jackson, a father and grandfather, proclaims, “It be high time we join our Southern brethren in this worthy quest!” He declares this ain’t about scallywag smokers bein’ punished but about providin’ a fair wind fer the health o’ the next generation. The bill, savvy as a ship in full sail, proposes a fine of but a hundred doubloons for those caught puffin’ in a car with a wee passenger under twelve.

So hoist the sails, and let it be known! If ye be caught smokin’ in the company of a young buccaneer, ye may find yerself lighter in the coin purse. Jackson be no stranger to this fight, havin' tried to pass a similar law nearly two decades ago, but alas, it never reached the governor’s desk. Here’s hopin’ this time, the winds favor his cause!

Read the Original Article