The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr, matey! After three decades in Davy Jones' locker, a Hawaii scallywag's set free from a wrongful murder rap!"

2025-02-24

Arrr, matey! Gordon Cordeiro, a scallywag of 51, was doin’ life for sendin’ a soul to Davy Jones in ‘94! But lo and behold, DNA be the key to his freedom! Released on Friday, he be sailin’ back to the high seas of liberty! Avast, what a twist!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of a scallywag named Gordon Cordeiro, a buccaneer of the courtroom, who found himself shackled in chains for a deed most foul back in the year of our Lord 1994. This swab was accused of sendin' a soul to Davy Jones' locker on the fair isle of Maui. Aye, he was sentenced to a life of hard labor, scrubbin' the decks o' justice, or so they thought!

But lo and behold! A twist in the tale emerged like a treasure map from the depths of the sea. DNA evidence, that magic potion of science, came sailin' in on the tide, settin' our matey free from his prison confines. On the fateful day of Friday, the 13th, no less, ol' Gordon was cut loose, like a ship released from the harbor. The lawmen and judges were left scratchin' their heads, wonderin' how they could've missed this fine point!

So here stands Gordon, a free man, ready to swap his prison garb for the garb o' the free seas. Avast, me mateys! Raise a tankard to justice and the curious ways of fate! Let this be a lesson to ye all: never underestimate the power of a bit o' DNA! Yarrr!

Read the Original Article