Arrr! The crew at Veterans Affairs be makin' walk the plank—over 1,400 scallywags lose their pay!
2025-02-25
Arrr, matey! The fine scallywags at the Department of Veterans Affairs be tossin' overboard more than 1,400 crewmen! In so doin’, they be savin’ a treasure o’ 83 million doubloons each year! Blimey, that be a jolly way to lighten the ship!
Aye mateys, listen close to this tale from the land of bureaucrats! The scallywags at the Department of Veterans Affairs be makin' some cuts, slashing more than 1,400 poor souls from their ranks, all because they be sittin' in "non-mission critical positions." Har har! These landlubbers, who’ve sailed less than a year in the competitive sea of service, be walkin’ the plank!With these cuts, the VA be savin' over $83 million doubloons each year, and they swear it’ll be used to bolster the health care for our brave veterans. The captain of this ship, Secretary Doug Collins, claims these decisions be harder than a barnacle-covered hull, but they promise it won’t sink the ship of care. He says veterans will feel a "change for the better." Aye, we’ll see about that!
As a last-ditch effort, the higher-ups can plead for some poor sods to be spared from this fate, but who knows if that’ll hold water? So keep yer eyes peeled, me hearties, for the VA be fixin' to redirect its resources for the good of our brave sea dogs and their families. Aye, let the tides bring better days ahead! Arrr!