Avast ye! Falcons’ cap’n spills the beans on ol’ Kirk’s fate after he walked the plank last season! Arr!
2025-02-25
Arrr, matey! Terry Fontenot, the grand poobah of the Falcons, be spillin' the beans on ol' Kirk Cousins after that scallywag was tossed aside fer the young lad, Michael Penix Jr. Aye, it be a right merry tale of footy folly on the high seas of the gridiron!
Avast, me hearties! Gather ‘round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the Atlanta Falcons and the curious case of one Kirk Cousins, who be still aboard the ship—err, team—at least for now! Aye, General Manager Terry Fontenot has proclaimed that Cousins, the 36-year-old scallywag, shan't be walkin' the plank just yet, as whispered at the NFL Draft combine.Our matey Cousins did start strong, hoisting the crew to a mighty 6-3, but alas, the winds changed! He got benched quicker than a pirate can say "shiver me timbers," due to a dreadful performance that saw him tossin’ more interceptions than a drunken sailor tosses back rum. With just one touchdown and nine interceptions in his last five games, the Falcons be sankin’ faster than a ship with a hole!
Despite a hefty bounty of $180 million tied to his name, Cousins found himself in a backup role, where he’s now expected to earn an eye-watering $27.5 million. And let’s not forget about that pesky $10 million roster bonus that looms like a Kraken in the depths! If the Falcons want to trade him, Cousins must lift the anchor of his no-trade clause—an unlikely venture, me thinks! So, hoist yer sails and watch this drama unfold, savvy?