Arrr, me hearties! Starmer be plundering the coffers fer defense, all 'cause Trump be makin' waves! Aye, what folly!
2025-02-25
Ahoy, mateys! Cap’n Keir Starmer be settin’ sail to hoist defense doubloons to near $17 billion yearly by the year of our Lord 2027! With them pesky Russians stirrin’ trouble in the European seas, it be wise to guard the treasure, savvy? Arrr!
Avast, me hearties! Gather ‘round, fer news from the high seas of Parliament, where the UK’s Prime Minister, Keir Starmer, be makin’ waves like a tempest! He be callin’ fer a plumpin’ o’ the treasure chest, boostin’ defense spendin’ to 2.5% of the gross domestic doubloons! That’s a hefty £13.4 billion more to fend off those scallywags from Russia!But hold yer horses, ‘cause there’s more! Starmer be settin’ his sights on a bold quest to reach 3% in the next Parliament, which be as far off as a ship on the horizon, not to arrive ‘til after 2029! As he gears up to parley with President Trump, he be sayin’ that Britain must rally, showin’ strength like a ship in full sail!
Yet, not all be smooth sailin’, mateys. Some landlubbers in the House be grumblin’, complainin’ that Starmer’s newfound gold be comin’ at the cost of overseas aid, which be droppin’ from 0.5% to 0.3%. Aye, MP Charolette Cane be callin’ such cuts "hugely short-sided," arguin’ that it be better to help keep the peace than throw gold at guns!
So, as Starmer prepares to meet the captain of the US ship, he be remindin’ all ye that true allies don’t be settin’ sail apart. Let’s hope they chart a course straight to prosperity, and may the winds be ever in their favor!