The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr, matey! Aye, we can stitch up a sailor's chest even 'fore the ship’s anchor drops!"

2025-03-04

Arrr, me hearties! Aye, if yer matey be droppin' like a sack o' potatoes from a heart stoppin’ blow, a swift slice o' the chest might just bring 'em back to life! Especially if it be that pesky tamponade causin' the ruckus! Blimey!

Ahoy, me hearties! Gather ‘round as I spin ye a tale o’ mighty medical marvels on the high seas o’ trauma! When a scallywag meets his fate in a tragic mishap, and his heart stops beatin’ like a ship in a tempest, there be a trick up the old sleeve – the prehospital resuscitative thoracotomy! Aye, ‘tis a fancy term for a bit o’ surgery out in the wild, done quick as a wink to save a matey in dire straits!

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