"Arrr! Trump be layin' the gold doubloons heavy on China, Canada, and Mexico! Let the tariffs fly, me hearties!"
2025-03-04
Arrr, mateys! At the stroke of midnight Tuesday, Captain Trump be raisin' the taxes on loot from China, Canada, and Mexico! Now, U.S. traders be payin' a hefty 10% extra on their treasures! Avast, prepare to plunder deeper into yer doubloons, ye scallywags!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round, fer I bring ye tidings from the high seas of trade! Our captain, President Trump, has hoisted the sails on new tariffs, which be settin’ sail at the stroke of midnight on Tuesday morn. Aye, the U.S. importers be feelin’ the pinch, as taxes be climbin’ higher than a crow's nest in a tempest!Now, let me spin ye a yarn about our foe, China, the third-largest trader among us. With the crack o’ dawn, a fresh 10% tariff be slapped atop the previous 10% we already be payin’. It be like addin’ a second layer of barnacles to a ship that’s already weighin’ down! Aye, the Chinese booty be costin’ us more doubloons than ever, and the merchants be grumblin' like scallywags at sea.
But wait! The winds of change also blowin’ from the north and south! Canada and Mexico, our trusty mates, be face to face with new tariffs too. They be the biggest bilge rats in our trade pond, and now their goods be takin’ a hit. 'Tis a right jolly mess, I say! So, hoist yer flag and prepare yer ships, fer we be sailin' into uncharted waters in this treacherous trade sea!