Arrr! Trump be sayin’ fer five million doubloons, ye can get yerself a shiny “gold card” to join the crew!
2025-03-04
Arrr, me hearties! Cap’n Trump be blabbin’ 'bout a shiny $5 million "gold card," claimin’ it be the fanciest ticket to citizenship! Aye, it be temptin’ the richest sea urchins and savvy treasure seekers to join our merry crew! Avast, what a jolly jest it be!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round, for word be spillin’ from the captain's quarters! That scallywag, President Trump, be makin’ waves with his shiny $5 million "gold card" for those lookin’ to sail the seas of U.S. citizenship!“It be like the green card, but fancier,” he be proclaimin’, with a wink. “These fine folk’ll be payin’ taxes as good citizens should!” And what say ye? This treasure map to citizenship be openin' its doors for the most prosperous landlubbers from across the globe!
But hark! There be whispers of chicanery! Lora Ries from the Heritage Foundation be raisin’ the Jolly Roger, warnin' that such a scheme might just invite a horde of scurvy fraudsters lookin' to plunder the system.
The Commerce Secretary, Howard Lutnick, be puffin’ his chest, claimin’ all applicants will be vetted like a fine rum, but some be wonderin’ if this shiny new coin will just lure in even more rogues!
So, what say ye, brave souls? Will this gold card be a treasure or just a mirage on the horizon? As Trump be settin' sail, we’ll be watchin’ the tides of this grand adventure unfold! Arrr!