Arrr! Columbia be clashin' with wily landlubbers, puttin' the kibosh on an Israeli captain's visit while Trump ponderin' $5B booty!
2025-03-05
Arrr, me hearties! On the eve of a grand shindig at Columbia, a ruckus brewed as landlubbers protested against Israel, all whilst the former captain of that ship, Naftali Bennet, graced us with his presence! Aye, what a jolly tempest of opinions blowin' through the halls!
Arrr mateys! Gather 'round fer a tale from the hallowed halls of Columbia University, where a ruckus erupted like a cannon blast when the former Israeli captain, Naftali Bennett, set his sights on the campus! Over a hundred scallywags protested outside, lettin’ their voices be heard like a parrot squawkin’ on me shoulder!Organized by the fine galleons of Columbia/Barnard Hillel and the Institute o’ Global Politics, the event was intended to enlighten the young scholars. "Aye, it went off without a hitch!" claimed Brian Cohen, spokesperson for the Kraft Center, though they had to keep the event as secretive as a treasure map, only allowin’ invited souls to join the discourse.But fear not, for the pirates from Columbia JVP and the Palestine Solidarity Coalition showed up to protest, likin’ it to a skirmish on the high seas! The university, like a good captain, assured us they prepared for any tumult, with the NYPD keepin’ order outside the gates.In the end, the clash of ideas sailed on, while the storm of protests be blowin’ fiercely across the land. As we wait fer calmer seas, one can only hope fer a day when all can share rum and ideas freely, without the need for iron bars! Ahoy!