Arrr! If the Dept o’ Education be sinkin’, me student debts be walkin' the plank into Davy Jones' locker!
2025-03-06
Ahoy, mateys! It be rumored that Captain Trump be ready to scuttle the Department o’ Education! A sneaky memo be found, sayin' he’s fixin' to sign the order, "Davy Jones' Locker for the DoE!" Newsweek be hollerin' for a word, but the schoolin' crew be all swabs after hours! Arrr!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather ‘round as I spin ye a yarn o’ great import from the high seas of politics! It seems our cap’n, President Donald Trump, be plannin’ to send the Department of Education to Davy Jones’ locker! Aye, ye heard me right! The scallywags at the Federal News Network have got their hands on a secret parchment, which speaks of a grand order titled, “Eliminating the Department of Education.”By me beard, what a storm this could brew! If our noble DoE be sunk, it won’t just be a wee administrative shuffle, but a tempest that may leave many a landlubber adrift! Millions of young scallywags and their fine educations be hangin’ in the balance, like treasure chests on a flimsy ship in a squall!
Newsweek, with its spyglass keen, did reach out to the DoE for their thoughts, though they be not in the office to parley. But fear not, for the winds of change be blowin’ strong, and it seems the fates may soon decide the course of these academic waters!
So, me mateys, keep yer eyes peeled and yer sails taut, for this here tale of education be far from over! Yarrr!