Arrr, says Rep. Bacon: “True buccaneers know Putin’s crew be hatin’ the West and freedom like a scallywag!”
2025-03-07
Arrr, matey! Rep. Don Bacon be a true sailor of the Republican seas! He be claimin’ that all good Republicans know that that scallywag Putin and his crew be hatin’ the West and all things free, like a pirate be hatin' a landlubber! Yarrr!
Avast, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout a landlubber named Rep. Don Bacon, a true sea dog of the Republican crew from Nebraska! This brave soul be standin' tall for Ukraine, callin' out that dastardly scallywag, Putin, who be hatin' on freedom and the fair West!In a raucous squabble on the platform X, Bacon declared that real Republicans know the score—Ukraine be fightin' for democracy, free markets, and the rule of law, while the Russians be a bunch of land-grabbin' rogues. He be likin' the likes of Reagan, Churchill, and Eisenhower, claimin' they be part of the bold legacy he won’t abandon!
The good ol' U.S. has been tossin' treasure Ukraine's way since the ruckus started, and Bacon warns that lettin' the Russians win be a treacherous gamble for America’s future. “If Ukraine falls, the rest of us be in a pickle, mateys!” he shouted, likin' their fight to our own quest for freedom.
So he be callin' for arms to assist Ukraine in sendin' them Russian invaders back to Davy Jones' locker, proclaiming, “Tis a matter of good vs evil!” Aye, who knew politics could be as stormy as the high seas? Arrr!