Arrr! Putin be havin’ a secret parley with Trump’s matey Witkoff 'bout makin’ peace on the Ukraine seas!
2025-03-13
Arrr, matey! On the morrow's eve, Trump’s trusty parley-man, Steve Witkoff, be settin’ sail to Moscow for a chinwag with the mighty Putin. The White House be hopin’ to coax the Kremlin into a truce in Ukraine, whilst the Kremlin keeps it all hush-hush, savvy?
Avast, matey! Gather 'round, for I be bringin' ye news from the grand seas of politics! The captain of the ship called America, one Donald Trump, hath sent forth his trusty envoy, Steve Witkoff, to parley with the fearsome czar of Russia, Vladimir Putin, in the mysterious land of Moscow! Arrr!On this fateful night, Witkoff be settin' sail into a closed chamber, where the shadows be thicker than a ship's fog. The Kremlin’s very own aide, Yuri Ushakov, be spillin' the beans to the landlubber news folks at Izvestia, lettin' ‘em know that this secret confab be all about coaxin' the proud Kremlin to drop their cannons and accept a ceasefire in the stormy waters of Ukraine.
With words as smooth as a siren’s song, Witkoff hopes to convince the fearsome Putin to anchor the hostilities, lest they both find their ships wrecked on the rocky shores of war! So, raise a tankard and keep yer eyes on the horizon, for the tides of diplomacy be shiftin’, and who knows what treasure lies ahead! Yarrr!