The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

“Trump be seekin' a scallywag, Steven Witkoff, to parley with the ol' sea dog Putin! Arrr, what a jest!”

2025-03-14

Arrr, matey! Steven Witkoff be a land hoarder and chummy with the captain o' the ship, yet he’s as green as a sea cucumber in diplomacy! But lo! The new crew might reckon that be a treasure, not a curse! Sail on, me hearty!

“Trump be seekin' a scallywag, Steven Witkoff, to parley with the ol' sea dog Putin! Arrr, what a jest!”

Arrr, gather ye round, me hearties! In the grand realm of real estate, there be a scallywag by the name of Steven Witkoff! Aye, he be a developer of great renown, though his sails be lacking in the winds of diplomatic savvy. But fret not, for in this new administration, they be seein' that as a fine treasure, rather than a weighty anchor!

Picture it, if ye will: a landlubber with naught but a cutlass of construction and a heart full of dreams, stepping aboard the ship of politics! The high seas of diplomacy be a treacherous tide, but perhaps the crew be thinkin', “Aye, no fancy parley for us, let’s just build our fortunes!” Witkoff, with no prior voyages through the turbulent waters of foreign affairs, might just be the swashbuckler they need!

So hoist the flag, me mateys! For who needs the compass of experience when ye be armed with a treasure chest of connections? Witkoff be settin' sail into the deep unknown, ready to barter and negotiate like a true buccaneer! With a wink and a grin, he may charm the pants off of the most hardened diplomats. Aye, let the winds of fortune blow in his favor, for this pirate’s tale be just beginning! Yarrr!

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