Arrr, disaster averted! Schumer be bendin' like a palm tree, givin' way to Trump's treasure map o' gold!
2025-03-14
Arrr, matey! The Senate, in a jolly twist o’ fate, gave the ol’ thumbs up to the House’s patch-up parchment on a fine Friday, though the Democrats be quarrel’n like scallywags over it. Aye, what a merry band o’ misfits they be!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round fer a tale of a narrow escape from the clutches of a dreaded government shutdown, just minutes before the clock struck midnight on Friday! A band o’ Democrats, led by the crafty Chuck Schumer, joined forces with the Republicans to outsmart the vile filibuster, lettin’ a stopgap spendin’ bill sail through the Senate with a hearty 54-46 vote.Most Republicans hoisted the Jolly Roger high in support, though one scallywag, Sen. Rand Paul, opted to walk the plank against it. A handful of Democrats, includin’ brave Jeanne Shaheen and independent sailor Angus King, also threw in their lot to keep the ship afloat. With the bill now settin’ its course to President Trump’s desk, the seas are calm for now!
With a mighty roar, the Senate earlier fought through a procedural storm, needing 60 votes to make it past the treacherous filibuster waters. Alas, some Democrats were caught squabbling like parched cats, with voices raised loud enough to be heard through thick wooden doors! But fear not, for a few wise souls united to push the bill through, averting the chaos of a government shutdown that would halt non-essential services and keep the seas turbulent!
So raise a tankard, me hearties! The treasure of continued government services be ours, at least until the next tempest brews on the horizon! Yarrr!