Arrr, the Falcons be keepin’ Kirk Cousins aboard fer now, tossin’ him a shiny bonus! Aye, what a merry crew!
2025-03-15
Arrr! The scallywags in the Atlanta Falcons' crew be keepin' that ol' sea dog, Kirk Cousins, aboard till Saturday. By me hook, they be handin' over a treasure of $10 million doubloons! Aye, what a jolly haul for a man who throws like a landlubber!
Arrr mateys, gather 'round as we spin the yarn of one Kirk Cousins, a swashbucklin' quarterback not yet cast adrift from the Atlanta Falcons' crew. The Falcons be honorin’ his $10 million bounty, should he remain aboard after the stroke of four bells on Saturday.This rogue be benched last season, plagued by the curse of thirteen interceptions in but five matches, sparkin’ a shift to young Michael Penix, who be takin’ the helm. Yet, in a twist worthy of the high seas, Cousins signed a grand contract worth $180 million, with a hefty treasure of $90 million guaranteed. Just weeks later, the Falcons shocked all by pickin' young Penix with their prized eighth draft pick!
While whispers of a bitter divorce filled the salty air, the Falcons' captain, Terry Fontenot, declared his comfort in keepin' Cousins as the backup, a trusty mate to the new ship's captain. Yet, Cousins be eyein' distant shores, whisperin' to the owner about a trade to a team where he might steer the ship again.
With $27.5 million owed next season, the Falcons must weigh their decisions wisely. Should they cut him loose, it’ll cost them dearly, but if they be patient, they may find a jolly roger to sail with Cousins, who holds the final say on any potential trade. So hoist the sails, me hearties, for the journey be far from over!