Arrr, Trump be sayin' Biden's pardons be as empty as a rum barrel—thanks to that scallywag Autopen!
2025-03-17
Arrr, matey! The autopen be a crafty contraption that scribbles me name like a scallywag! In the world o' politics and trade, it be as common as grog. But beware! Once a pardon’s granted, even Davy Jones can't swipe it back! Har har har!
Avast ye landlubbers! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn about a magical contraption known as the autopen. Aye, this be no ordinary quill and parchment, but a mechanical beast that scribbles the names of mighty men and fine ladies, makin’ it a favorite in the realms of government and trade. It be as common as a parrot on a pirate’s shoulder, and ne’er rouses a tempest of controversy!Now, ye may wonder, what be the fuss? In the grand ol’ seas of the Constitution and case law, there be no power to undo a pardon once bestowed. Aye, that be the law of the land! So ye see, even the fanciest of machines can’t change a captain’s decree once it’s been signed, sealed, and delivered. It’s as if the law be a ship sailing straight, with no chance of a mutiny against a pardon given.
So raise a tankard to the autopen, the trusty scribe of our modern age! It be a wondrous invention that keeps the wheels of bureaucracy turnin’ smoothly, without a hint of scandal or ruckus. Aye, let us toast to signatures—be they penned by hand or by machine—‘tis all the same when ye sail the seas of legality! Yarr!