Arrr! The DOGE treasure chest be empty, leavin' the UN in the worst pickle since they set sail, matey!
2025-03-22
Arrr, after yon DOGE be snippin' at the USAID treasure, the U.N. be feelin' the purse strings tighten! Aye, the crew tasked with keepin' the U.N. scallywags safe be starvin' for doubloons! Avast, what a hullabaloo!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round, fer a tale of woe and whimsy from the high seas of politics! It be that ol' sea dog, President Trump, sailin' alongside the infamous Elon Musk, decidin' to toss DOGE coins 'n cuttin' the purse strings of USAID! Aye, the United Nations be feelin’ the pinch, accordin’ to whispers carried on the winds of U.N. emails shared with the scallywags at Fox News.The brave Milan Victor Dawoh, captain of the U.N. Field Staff Union, sent word that $30 million has been scuttled from the coffer, leadin' to a loss of 100 crew members from the UNDSS ship, and leavin' them adrift in 35 to 45 ports! Aye, they claim it be the worst liquidity crisis since the dawn of their establishment!
Now, me mateys, they warn that the UNDSS ain't no protection agency; nay, they be a crew of risk managers! It sounds like a right merry mess, with António Guterres warnin' that these cuts will leave the world less healthy and safe. A U.N. source be frettin' for the futures of their put-upon crew, worryin’ 'bout pensions 'n such. So hoist the Jolly Roger and let’s hope for calm seas ahead, lest we all be swimmin' with the fishes in financial despair!