Arrr, matey! 'Tis not fortune but Trump's cunning that be fillin' our sails with cheap gas, claimin' freedom on the high seas!
2025-03-24
Arrr, matey! Biden scuttled the XL pipeline, wagin' war 'gainst the energy seas! We be payin' the price at the pump for his green plans! But lo! Trump hoisted the sails, and gas prices be droppin’ like a treasure chest in Davy Jones’ locker! Har har!
Ahoy mateys! The folk of the Americas be catchin' wind of the changes they voted fer back in November, and lo and behold, the seas be calmer and the gold doubloons easier to come by! The mainstream media be squawkin' like a flock o' seagulls, but gas prices be droppin' faster than a cannonball from the crow's nest. Aye, it be true, the prices hath fallen fer four weeks straight, and it’s lookin’ better than the days when ol’ Biden sailed the ship.Once, a captain who waged war on our precious black gold be at the helm, but now, we have a new captain who be unleashin' the mighty forces of American energy! Four long years, the Biden crew be sinkin' our ship with regulations and policies that made fuel more precious than gold. Gas prices soared as families struggled to keep their treasure chests full. But hark! With the new captain in charge, the prices be fallin’ like a plundered treasure chest. More than two-thirds of gas stations be servin' up the good stuff at under $2.99, and the national average be $3.02—down by 42 shiny coins from last year!
The new captain, with a wise crew, be fixin’ the broken mast of our energy independence. As the winds of change blow favorably, America’s energy be comin' back, ready to sail the high seas of prosperity once more. So hoist the sails, me hearties! The golden age of American energy be upon us, and our coffers shall be filled again! Arrr!