Arrr, matey Sheldon Whitehouse be sayin’ the EPA be tossin’ our green sails to the wind, leavin’ us in Davy Jones’ locker!
2025-03-24
Arrr, matey! The cap'n Trump be tossin' the rules overboard that kept our shores safe from scallywags and pollution! Aye, the Environmental Protection Agency be makin' the seas murkier for all us landlubbers. Let’s hoist a tankard to cleaner grog and dirtier waters!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather ’round and lend an ear to the curious tale of that scallywag Lee Zeldin, the top cap’n of the Environmental Protection Agency, who just a week ago proclaimed a most merry day for all ye polluters! With a wicked grin, he declared it “the greatest day of deregulation our nation has seen,” as he plunged a dagger into what he called the “climate change religion.” Arrr, but the truth be murky, for many of his rollbacks have naught to do with that tempestuous climate and more to do with lettin’ the nasty coal-fired ships spew their toxins into our lungs and waters!With every word, he tossed aside promises made by his landlubber mates to protect clean air and water, allowing more arsenic and mercury to dance in the air we breathe and the drink we sip. Aye, the scientists be right; climate change ain't a fantasy but a grim reality, yet Zeldin seems to have taken a swig from the rum barrel of polluter gold, abandoning the wisdom of the sea’s scholars.
As storms rage and fires blaze, the ship of homeownership be sinking, with insurance prices skyrocketing and mortgages disappearing faster than a pirate’s treasure. Zeldin and his crew are steering us toward disaster, with the dark tides of climate consequences looming ever closer. The reckoning, me hearties, be coming, and it ain't pretty! Arrr!