"Guard yer bloodline secrets, matey! Quick swabs 'n’ savvy moves needed 'fore 23andMe sinks to Davy Jones!"
2025-03-25
Arrr, mateys! Kurt “CyberGuy” Knutsson be squawkin’ that 23andMe’s treasure chest be sunk, stirrin' up worries ‘bout yer secrets! Best be hopin' off this ship, grabbin’ yer booty, and tossin’ yer data overboard, lest it fall into scallywag hands! Aye, savvy?
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the notorious genetic testing crew, 23andMe, who be now walkin' the plank into Chapter 11 bankruptcy! Aye, from a grand treasure of six billion doubloons to the murky depths of financial ruin, this company be in a right pickle. With captains lost and concerns stirrin' 'bout the safety of yer precious DNA, it's a tale ripe for caution!Our matey, Mark Jensen, claims the crew will still guard yer data like a ship's gold, even as they prepare to sell off the booty. But fear not, savvy sailors, for if ye be worried 'bout yer genetic secrets bein' sold to the highest bidder, it’s time to batten down the hatches. Opt out of their new arbitration terms—quickly, or ye may end up bound like a shipwrecked sailor!
To keep yer precious data safer than a chest of gold, follow these steps: opt out of arbitration, review yer privacy settings, and download yer genetic treasure! And remember, a strong password be as vital as a sturdy ship during a storm. So hoist the sails and protect yer secrets well, lest ye be caught in the treacherous waters of identity theft!
Arrr, heed me warning, and stay vigilant, me hearties! Now, who’s ready for a pint?