Arrr! The Trump crew be callin' the Signal tale a trick, after it be spillin' tales o' war plans!
2025-03-26
Arrr! The scallywags of the Trump crew be claimin’ that the Atlantic, in its own folly, tossed out the tale o’ senior sea dogs sharin’ "war plans" in a Signal chat fit for the editor-in-chief! A jolly good jest, I say!
Ahoy there, mateys! Gather 'round for a tale of the Trump crew and their misadventure on the seas of communication! It be said that the noble folk of the Atlantic magazine claimed to have spied on some high-seas chatter 'twixt the nation’s finest minds about a strike on them pesky terrorists in Yemen. But lo and behold, the Trump shipmates be shoutin' that no "war plans" were afoot—just a bit of bluster from a scallywag journalist, they say!Our brave press secretary, Karoline Leavitt, took to the digital waters, declaring, “A hoax! No war plans here!” while the security advisor, Mike Waltz, chimed in that there were no secrets spilled—just a warning to foreign mates that trouble was brewin'. The Atlantic's own scribe, Jeffrey Goldberg, claimed he was privy to some texty treasure from a Signal chat, but the Trump crew waved their cutlasses, proclaiming it was all nonsense!
Then, as if by some foul sorcery, the Atlantic published more texts without the dreaded "war plans" label, calling them "attack plans" instead! Aye, it seems the winds of journalism blow ever so whimsically! So here we be, with Trump and his crew claimin' they’ve done naught wrong, while the Atlantic be catchin' the waves of controversy. Yarr, what a ruckus on these digital seas!