Arrr, NPR and PBS captains be swabbin' the deck, defendin' their honor 'gainst lawmakers' tall tales of favoritism!
2025-03-26
Arrr, me hearties! NPR's Captain Katherine Maher and PBS's matey Paula Kerger sailed before the House crew, swashbucklin' against claims of bein' biased by the landlubber Republicans. They be defendin' their fair waters of public broadcastin' with a hearty laugh and a wink, sayin', "We be no scallywags!"
Arrr, gather 'round ye scallywags and listen well! The fair lass Katherine Maher, captain o' the NPR ship, and her matey Paula Kerger from PBS, be steppin' into the treacherous waters o' the House subcommittee this Wednesday. Aye, they faced a crew o' Republican lawmakers who were accusin' 'em of bein' as biased as a parrot who only squawks the captain's favorite shanties!With the wind at their backs and a glimmer of courage in their eyes, these two fine women stood tall, defendin’ their beloved public broadcasts from the cannonballs o' political accusations. "Nay, good sirs!" they cried, "We be impartial as a ship adrift on a calm sea! Our missions be to inform the landlubbers, not sway 'em with our own whims!"
The lawmakers, however, were like a crew o' disgruntled deckhands, not buyin' the tale. They pointed fingers and shouted louder than a rum-soaked buccaneer at a tavern brawl. But Maher and Kerger held fast, like seasoned sailors in a storm, claimin’ their broadcasts be a treasure trove of truth and fairness!
So, me hearties, let it be known that public broadcasting ain't no scallywag's ship, but a grand vessel sailin' the seas of knowledge for all to enjoy! Yarrr!