Arrr, what scallywag be sittin’ on FEMA’s doubloons, eh? Let’s hoist the sails and shake loose the booty!
2025-03-27
Arrr, after a bleatin' from Elon Musk, the Trump crew be lobbin' orders that scuttled a treasure chest o' $100 billion in FEMA doubloons! Christopher Flavelle, a scribe for the New York Times, be tellin' tales of poor souls in North Carolina, still awaitin' their gold after Hurricane Helene's wrath!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round and lend yer ears to a tale of woe plunderin' the good folk o' North Carolina! After the notorious Elon Musk—aye, the techie sorcerer of space—flapped his jaw on the interwebs, the Trump crew be givin' orders that sank a treasure chest worth $100 billion in FEMA doubloons meant for disaster recovery! Arrr, what a scallywag move, savvy?Now, lend me yer heart, fer ol' Christopher Flavelle, a scribe of the New York Times, be chroniclin' the plight of the poor souls smacked upside the head by Hurricane Helene. Aye, these landlubbers be waitin' still, like barnacles on a ship's hull, for the emergency doubloons they so desperately be needin'! It be a fine mess, I tell ye, as they yearn for the precious aid while watchin' the sands of time slip through their fingers—like a ship lost at sea!
So, hoist yer tankards and raise a ruckus for these brave souls! Let’s hope they find their bounty soon, lest they be left to fend for themselves in the treacherous waters of disaster recovery. Yarrr, what a world we live in, filled with both fortune and folly!