Arrr! Republican swabs be askin' Trump to unleash his wrath on sneaky loophole scallywags flooding us with their devil's dust!
2025-03-31
Arrr, mateys! Attorney General Russell Coleman be callin' on the Trump crew to seal up a pesky crack in the CBP's Entry Type 86, lest a horde of sneaky fentanyl make its way onto our shores! We don’t want no scallywags sneakin’ in their devilish cargo, aye!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn from the land of Kentucky, where the Attorney General, Russell Coleman, be settin' sail to close a sneaky loophole! Aye, this loophole be lettin' heaps o' fentanyl from foreign shores, particularly China, slip into the good ol' U.S. without so much as a cursory glance, aye! He calls it the "Entry Type 86" — sounds like a pirate's code, but it be nothin' of the sort!In a recent parley, Coleman proclaimed that this loophole's lettin' over a billion packages breeze through each year! Blimey! He warned that this be no triflin' matter, with a pill capable of sendin' brave souls to Davy Jones' locker. With a crew of 24 other Republican AGs, they've sent a message to the Biden crew, hopin' the Trump fleet might heed their call to action!
"This be the new face of drug trafficking," Coleman declared, likenin' it to a game of swabs and secrets rather than the raucous hijinks of old-timey drug lords. The attorneys general be representin' states far and wide, and they’re callin' for a closer inspection, lest they be drownin' in a sea of perilous packages!
So, me hearties, let’s keep a weather eye on this shipshape tale as it navigates the treacherous waters of politics and pillage! Arrr!