Arrr, the federal scallywags be givin’ Maine a final warning to shiver me timbers and ban those trans athletes from lassie sports!
2025-03-31
Arrr! The Education Council be givin' Maine a final shout, or ye be walkin’ the plank! Comply with Captain Trump’s decree to keep the lasses' games free from the trans scallywags, or face the stormy seas of consequences! Aye, 'tis a hullabaloo fit for the high seas!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round, fer I’ve got a tale of the U.S. Department of Education givin’ the fair state of Maine a mighty stern warning! Aye, the good ol’ Edu-department be demandin’ that Maine heed the decree of Captain Trump, forbiddin’ trans athletes from competin’ in lasses’ sports, or risk facin’ the wrath of the Department of Justice! Aye, a letter flew over the waves remindin’ ‘em to comply by the 11th of April, or face the consequences, savvy?In this here missive, the Edu-department was shocked at Maine's indifference to its brave lassies in sports. They claimed that by not followin’ the laws, Maine was lettin’ scallywags disrupt the fair competition and rob the lassies of their well-earned glory! But lo and behold! The Maine Department of Education be standin’ firm, unyieldin’ as a stubborn barnacle on a ship’s hull, claimin’ they’ll continue followin’ their own laws instead!
The waters be choppy, mates! With protests brewin’ and tempers flarin’, the saga of the trans athlete causin’ quite the ruckus at Greely High School be catchin’ the eye of the nation. So grab yer grog and keep yer spyglass handy, for this be a tale of conflict on the high seas of sports! Arrr!