The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, me hearties! Wesleyan University be givin' the heave ho to legacy admissions, aye! No more scallywags gettin' special treatment!

2023-07-19

Arr, me hearties! With the Supreme Court's decree to ban race-conscious admissions, selective colleges be feelin' the heat to put an end to favorin' scallywags born from the loins of alumni. Avast! A fair wind be blowin' in the sails of change, me mateys!

Arr, me hearties! There be quite the commotion amongst the scholarly folks! The Supreme Court, in all its wisdom, has decreed that race-conscious admissions be banned. Blimey, this be putting the pressure on those fancy selective colleges, it is! But that's not all, me mateys. Aye, there be another matter at hand: preferences for children of alumni. Arr, it seems like these privileged scallywags might be in for a rough ride!

Oh, the irony be as thick as the fog on a stormy night at sea! These colleges, with their lofty reputations, have long been favoring the offspring of their own graduates. Aye, it be called "legacy admissions," and it be as controversial as a ship full of pirates looting a treasure chest. But now, with the Court's ruling, it be high time for these institutions to scrub the decks and get rid of this practice!

Imagine, me hearties, the uproar amongst those who thought their family connections would guarantee a spot in a prestigious college. They be weeping into their cups of grog, no doubt! No longer can they rely on their ancestors' achievements to open the doors to higher education. Aye, their sails be in need of a new wind, indeed!

But fear not, me mateys, for this be a victory for fairness and equality. No longer shall the sons and daughters of the privileged be given special treatment. It be a chance for those who truly deserve it to rise to the top, like a ship soaring on the crest of a wave!

So, me hearties, let us raise our glasses and toast to the end of legacy admissions. May the seas of academia become a level playing field, where all be judged by their own merit and not the exploits of their ancestors. Yo ho ho, and a bottle of rum for the future of education!

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