Arrr! Fox News be spillin’ the beans on campus scallywags, listin’ the landlubbers caught in hate’s trap!
2025-04-03
Avast, mateys! Fox News be servin' up a hearty platter o' tales in their "Antisemitism Exposed" scroll, revealin' the rise o' anti-Jewish mischief on the high seas of the U.S. and beyond. Arrr, let’s keep our wits about us and not let the scallywags win!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round, for the scallywags at Fox News be hoistin’ their “Antisemitism Exposed” banner, revealin’ a treacherous rise in anti-Jewish sentiment from the seven seas to the shores of the U.S.!In today’s jolly news, we hear of a college crackdown on students and professors caught in the stormy waters of alleged Hamas sympathies. The Trump crew be lockin’ ‘em up tighter than a treasure chest, claimin’ it’s all part of a grand national security strategy. Avast, there be a list of detained students available for ye curious swabs!
Meanwhile, high school graduates be spittin’ on their diplomas from Columbia University, refusin’ to attend after the school jolly well agreed to tussle with the antisemitism beast. The brand be tarnished, says one wise consultant, as students set sail for other shores!
And what’s this? “60 Minutes” lass Lesley Stahl be takin’ flak for askin’ a released hostage some downright ridiculous questions. The sea of public opinion be churnin’ with accusations of her sympathies for Hamas!
In the end, one anti-Israel protester be jumpin’ ship and leavin’ the U.S. outta fear, shoutin’ “Long live the student intifada!” as he sails away. Aye, the tides of antisemitism be risin’, and we pirates best keep our eyes peeled for more mischief on the horizon!