Arrr, matey! GOP scallywag be sayin’ foes be guffawin’ at us over them NSA walkin’ the plank!
2025-04-07
Arrr, Rep. Don Bacon be bellowin' like a scallywag over the sacking of Gen. Haugh, callin' it a heart-wrenchin' blow! 'Twas a day o' treachery when the good captain and his matey, Wendy, were tossed overboard, just as Trump’s crew be settin’ sail for chaos! Blimey!
Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn about Rep. Don Bacon, that fine gentleman from Nebraska, who be lamentin' the mysterious dismissal of the valiant Gen. Timothy Haugh, the captain of the NSA ship and head o' the Cyber Command crew. With a heavy heart, he called the decision "heartbreaking," as if a storm had blown away his favorite treasure map!Now, let me set the scene fer ye: 'Twas a dark day on the seas of politics, when Haugh and his trusty first mate, Wendy Noble, were given the ol' heave-ho from the ship on Thursday. Coincidentally, 'twas also the same fateful day that a crew of disgruntled members from President Trump's beleaguered National Security Council found themselves walkin' the plank! A right mutiny, if ye ask me!
But why, ye ask? Rumors be swirling like a whirlpool, and it seems the winds of change followed the notorious conspiracy theorist, Laura Loomer, as she sailed into the Oval Office with her wild tales. So, here we be, left scratchin' our heads, wonderin' why the brave captain and his mate have been cast aside. A tale as twisty as the Kraken's tentacles, I say! Arrr!