"Arrr! A Trump matey be brawlin' with a CBS scallywag 'bout whether the crew's using magic machines for gold taxes!"
2025-04-07
Arrr, Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick let out a hearty guffaw when CBS's fair wench Margaret Brennan dared ask if the magical contraptions o’ AI had a hand in conjurin’ the national treasure list under Captain Trump's flag o' tariffs! Aye, what a jolly jest, matey!
Arrr mateys, gather 'round as we spin a yarn o' commerce and cap'n Trump’s tariff storm! On a fine Sunday, CBS’ Margaret Brennan, sharp as a cutlass, did challenge Howard Lutnick, the Secretary o' Commerce, 'bout whether cunning artificials be at play in the crafting o' Trump’s grand tariff schemes.In a mighty spectacle dubbed "Liberation Day," the old sea dog announced a hefty 10% tax on imports, sending the stock market into a tempest fiercer than a rogue wave! Investors be floundering like fish outta water, the losses be akin to the dark days o’ the pandemic in 2020.
With a twinkle o' mischief, Brennan pointed out the curious case of the Heard and McDonald Islands, where nary a cargo ship sails, yet they find themselves on the tariff list! “Did ye use AI to conjure this madness?” she probed, but Lutnick chuckled, claiming that leaving countries off the list be akin to inviting trouble from crafty traders looking to slip through the cracks.
As the winds of trade negotiations blow, whispers of price hikes be in the air, so prepare yer coin purses! More tariffs be on the horizon, ready to set sail come April 9! So hoist yer flags high and brace for the storm, ye scallywags!