The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! A staunch buccaneer be leadin' the charge to take the helm from Louisiana's loyal governor, aye!

2023-10-13

Should Jeff Landry, the scurvy dog of a state attorney general and the prime contender, emerge victorious, mark me words, Louisiana shall be pushed further starboard on matters o' crime and the peculiarities o' L.G.B.T.Q. rights, arrr!


If Jeff Landry, the state attorney general and front-runner, takes the crown, mark my words, mateys, Louisiana will be sailing further starboard on matters of crime and L.G.B.T.Q. rights. Arrr, ye may wonder why I say this, but let me give ye the lowdown on this scallywag.


Jeff Landry be no ordinary landlubber. Nay, he be a fierce advocate for law and order, a man who be wantin' to crack down on the scurvy criminals that plague our fair state. But mark me words, his methods be controversial, and some may even say draconian. He be pushin' for harsher punishments, longer prison stays, and be a firm believer in the "lock 'em up and throw away the key" philosophy. So, if he be elected, ye can be sure that the wind be blowin' towards a more hardline approach to crime.


But that ain't all, me hearties. If Landry be takin' the helm, there be stormy seas ahead for L.G.B.T.Q. rights as well. He be known for his conservative views on social matters, and that be includin' matters of love and identity. Should he be given the power, he be likely to steer the ship away from progress and towards a more traditional, narrow-minded perspective on such matters. Our LGBTQ shipmates may find themselves battlin' against the waves for their rights and fair treatment.


Now, don't be thinkin' that I be favorin' one side or the other, mateys. I be just a humble observer of the political seas. But if ye be askin' me, Jeff Landry be a man of strong convictions, and those convictions be pointin' towards a rightward course for Louisiana. So, be prepared to reef the sails and brace yerselves, for a new captain be takin' the wheel, and we be in for a wild ride.

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