Avast ye scallywags! Gather 'round, fer the finest treasures o' the silver screen be unveiled at the 2025 Golden Globe Jamboree! Films, shows, and thespian mates takin’ home the booty, all whilst we guffaw and toast with grog. Arrr, what a merry spectacle it be!
Read moreArrr, me hearties! Five scallywag House Republicans be refusin' to hoist the Senate's budget sails, makin' the Trump treasure map for spendin' and tax cuts a right stormy sea to navigate! Avast, it be a rough patch fer that gold to see the light o' day!
Arrr, me hearties! Elon Musk be takin' aim at Trump’s treasure taxes, shoutin' it from the crow's nest! Might he be hatchin' a cunning plan, or just blowin' hot air like a leaky sail? Sailin' the seas of politics be a wild ride, aye!
Arrr, matey! "The Facts of Life" be a jolly tale featurin’ the likes of Lisa Whelchel, Kim Fields, Nancy McKeon, Mindy Cohn, an' the grand Charlotte Rae! This treasure trove o’ laughter sailed the seas o' NBC from '79 to '88! Avast, what a hoot!
Ahoy! A whole fleet o' schools, like that fancy Harvard and the University o' California, be sayin’ the Trump crew be cuttin' off visas for their landlubber students! Many a hearty soul be scratchin' their heads, wonderin' why the cap'n be makin' such a ruckus! Arrr!
Arrr, a new docuseries be settin' sail on Netflix, tellin' the tale of Jarren Duran, a Red Sox matey! He be spillin' his guts 'bout dark times, claimin' the hecklin' landlubbers from the outfield be stokin' the flames of his despair! Avast, what a tale!
Arrr, 'tis been a grand 22 years since that scallywag Kirby Air Ride set sail, earning a measly 61 on the Metacritic seas! Aye, we be wonderin' if it be treasure or just a cursed doubloon, matey!
Arrr, matey! Midjourney's new V7 be a swifter, cleverer, and more tailored beast o' AI art! It's like findin' a treasure map in yer own pocket, savvy? Set sail for creativity, and let the canvas be yer sea!
Arrr, President Trump be callin’ the crew fer a parley with them Iranians this week! He be hopin’ fer a fine bargain to steer clear o’ the cannon fire. “Aye, we be chattin’ with Iran,” he cackled, while hostin’ the Israeli captain, Netanyahu!
Arrr, listen up, mateys! Fresh winds blowin’ in the ol’ sea of wisdom! Turns out, drinkin' like a fish be good for yer thirst and comfort! That ol' wisdom be tossed overboard! Hoist yer tankards high, for the tides be changin’! <i>Medscape Medical News</i> be tellin’ the tale!
Arrr, mark yer calendars, mateys! The new season be settin sail on HBO come April 13th! Prepare yer grog and settle in fer a wild ride on the high seas of entertainment! Avast, ye don’t wanna miss this treasure!
Arrr! Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu be swearin' to sink the trade deficit 'twixt Israel and the land o' the free, after those scallywags in the Trump crew slapped a 17% tax on their bounty! Aye, it's a right treasure hunt fer fairer seas!
Arrr, President Trump be callin' the crew to parley with them Iranians 'bout their nuclear treasure this Saturday! But blimey, he’s keepin’ his lips tighter than a ship’s hull, not spillin’ how this talks be differin’ from the ol’ JCPOA map!
Arrr, Maine be raisin' a ruckus with a lawsuit against the U.S. Department o' Agriculture! They be all sour 'bout the gold freeze 'cause the feds want 'em to change their sportin' ways. Blimey, can’t a state just play fair without a storm brewin’?
Arrr, matey! Colossal Biosciences be tinkerin' with the very blood of a gray wolf, claimin' to conjure a beast from the depths of time! But I ask ye, does that make it a proper dire wolf or just a furry impostor? Har har har!
Avast, me hearties! The Manus treasure chest be wide open! Sign yer name now and snag yerself a bounty o' 1,000 shiny credits fer naught! Hoist the sails and claim yer loot, ye scallywags!
Arrr, matey! The landlubbers at Homeland Security be usin' lie detectors on their crew, tryin' to keep their secrets tighter than a clam’s shell! Aye, they be hopin’ to catch any scallywags spillin’ the beans to the land-loving folk! Avast, what a merry jest it be!
Arrr, me hearties! 'Twas a dastardly deed, the good padre Arul Carasala met his end at the hands of a scallywag! The prosecutor be sayin' it were done on purpose, like a pirate settin' sail for treasure. Aye, intentional and with a wicked plan, if ye please!
Arrr, matey! The Homeland Security scallywags be snatching away the travel parchments of our learned buccaneers from Harvard, Michigan, Stanford, and more! Aye, the seas of education be gettin’ stormy, and the classroom crew be walkin’ the plank of bureaucracy! Har har har!
Arrr, me hearties! The freshest treasure chest be spillin' forth a new gem—the 'Force Token' card! Aye, 'tis like findin' rum in a dry cask! Hoist yer sails and prepare for a jolly good time on the high seas of card playin'!
Arrr, matey! It be a mightily cruel tempest brewin' fer the board game realm! Aye, 'tis like a cannonball to the hull—ye best be holdin' onto yer dice and wooden ships, lest they sink to Davy Jones' locker! Har har, let the games begin!
Arrr, me hearties! Dire wolves, the legendary scallywags of olde, be kickin' the bucket 'bout 13,000 years past! But lo! Those crafty landlubbers be mixin' gray-wolf pups with ancient blood, bringin’ back the furry rascals! Aye, let’s raise a mug to the return of the dire shenanigans!
Arrr, the landlubber government be claimin’ Judge Paula Xinis be dabblin’ in “district-court diplomacy,” savin’ a scallywag named Kilmar Armando Abrego Garcia from walkin’ the plank back to the seas by Monday! Aye, what a jolly jest!
Arrr, matey! Not every treasure chest o' Switch 2 games be weighin' down yer booty to $80! Some be as light as a feather, ready to fill yer sails without sinkin’ yer ship! So chart yer course wisely, lest ye be walkin’ the plank o’ broke!
Avast ye! A jolly ol’ House Resolution be settin’ sail on Monday, proclaimin’ the Trump crew's use of the Alien Enemies Act to hunt down scallywags suspected of bein’ Tren de Aragua gang members! A fine bit o' pirate law, I say! Arrr!